I sat with my three year old son watching an old Sinbad film. You know… the ones with the super-imposed clay monsters overlaid upon a screen of overacting, overdressed Caucasian actors with bad fake tans. It’s all wooden acting and rubber swords. Naturally, he loved it to bits, and was completely engrossed in the film.

There's a scene where a ‘Cyclops’ appears and attacks Sinbad’s band. He squashed several sailors with an uprooted tree and then tries to spit-roast another (fully clothed) over his BBQ fire. Cyclops stands about 35ft tall in his cinematic guise and has the upper body of a human, the head of a one-eyed monster and the lower body of a goat or fawn.

Some time later my son was excitiedly trying to explain the unusual configuration of Cyclops to his mother, who had (made sure that she) missed the film. The toddler, trying to describe a cloven hoof – without ever having the encountering the correct term, explained the lower half of monsters body (without a second’s hesitation) as consisting of “furry trousers and moo-shoes.”

As far as original words of wisdom from a three year old are concerned, “moo-shoes” does it for me.