Youth
and adolescence

I am young , with fragile knowledge
but I recieve and collate
receptive to what
there is to know
I soak up everything
in growing brain sponge
ruminate
way past too early
cogitate
'till gone too late
and boredom screws me at the abusers gate

You have things I use
emotional leverage
silence
and hollow platitudes
broken rules
bleeding hearts
the beast of resolve
the burden of attitude
open ended false starts
crushed by acid
sizzled gratitude
and I don't really matter anymore to you

Take chances , take risks
calculate the odds
and disregard them
through broken eyes
and spasm fists
give you the heebie-jeebies
in your fitful dreams
drenched
in red mist
and I refuse the offered maternal kiss

See your order dissolve
scorn your advice
shatter your concept
of 'nice'
spit bewilderment
in your face
shocked
like nerves , iced
disobey convention
squirt venom
at you and your old school anal retention

I am teenage bile
choking
I am attitude
no joking
I am
in your heated words
good - for - nothing
when you die
I want to screw
the lid down on your cheap shit coffin

I drive you
round the bend
with my catalogue guitar
singing about suicide
from my self-penned
three song repertoire
I know who I am
but you
don't know who you are
you are close
but I am distant
and now the gap has stretched too far .