I went into a pub one day
on the bar I placed a sack.
And from it came a one foot man
with a piano on his back.

The landlord looked and was surprised
and knew not what to say.
He stood there frozen to the spot
and watched the small man play.

He said " Tell me where you got him
and your bar slate I will scrub."
So I produced my magical golden lamp
and said " Give that a rub."

A Genie appeared in a puff of smoke
and said " Come to me dear.
I'll grant one wish so be careful what
you whisper in my ear."

The wish was granted, the Genie gone
and from the floor arose a fog.
We heard a sound and made it out
as the barking from a dog.

I watched it all but soon lost count,
dogs as far as the eye could see.
Surrounded by a canine crowd
from almost every pedigree.

The barman said " That Genie's deaf
what can I do with these hounds?
My one wish has been wasted now
I asked for a million POUNDS."

" I know" I said " She's rather crap
but it doesn't take a genius.
To realise that I never asked
for a twelve inch pianist."