I've got an idea of my perfect mate
that I'm sure one day I'll meet.
The type of girl that's often seen
in any East London street.

The lips of Angelina Jolie
'cause the really pack some clout.
Although a kiss from her would very probably
turn me inside out.

The voice of Katherine Jenkins
who can hit the notes that soothe.
Not to mention the fact her silky tones
make my nether regions move.

The breasts of Catherine Zeta Jones
the girl from a Welsh back alley.
I could take a jump off a diving board
and spend hours in her valley.

The legs of Penny Lancaster
Mrs Rod Stewart, a sight to see.
What she sees in that millionaire superstar
is something way beyond me.

The rest of the body could be Cher's
her age doesn't bother me.
Any time she starts to look a bit rough
I'd book more surgery.

I'll take the morals of Sharon Stone
in that Basic Instinct movie.
I think I'd escape an ice pick death
'cause I can be a bit of a smoothie.

Very soon I'll meet my fantasy girl
and that day can't come to soon.
But till then I'll carry on living with my mum
in my Superman themed bedroom.