Sex is a really lovely gift
but do we ever get it right?
Some do it in the daytime
but most in the dead of night.

First time nerves are running high
you go to where she beckoned.
You think yourself a super stud
but you're done within a second.

You become a randy teenager
and charm girls into bed.
There's just one place that ever works
and that is in your head.

You age and you are Jack The Lad
and strip off with a grin.
She sends you crashing back to earth
when she asks you if it's in.

At middle age you become mature
and make sex last a while.
You make the most as very soon
you'll struggle to raise a smile.

I was a slow developer
and had sex at thirty three.
Till then I thought it just for scratching
or simply stiring tea.

So now I try to fill my boots
but with sex I'm still not sure.
Why I seem to get things over quick
please don't mention premature