This story is a very mellow, reflective one. Special thanks to Hugh Hazelton for your constructive advice, which I have implemented into the story.
Streaks of sunset pierce through the brilliant blue sky. She inhales the sultry air as she sits by the sea, hugging her knees as her eyes flood. At the tender age of 27, she’s never felt more alone. Emitting a bassy thud from the club overlooking the beach, the music echoes through the night; the soundtrack to her train of deep thoughts. The warm breeze ripples through her clothes, her beautiful lips trembling as she fights prevailing tears.
The influx of memories overpowers her senses. It was along this beach that she’d fallen in love four years ago. It was some two years ago that her heart was broken, and this is where she’s come to repair it. He was the first man she’d ever loved; but he despised her. He despised her until she could no longer recognise her pretty face in the mirror. The last memory she has of him is a sad one. She closes her eyes as her mind takes her back...
She’d cut her evening short to come home and surprise him with a diamond encrusted platinum wristwatch. It was specially presented in a red velvet box and she couldn’t wait to give it to him. She had spent 22 weeks saving for it, working double shifts in a tiresome effort to recapture his interest in her. Their past until recently had been tumultuous, but lately things were much better. He’d been spending more time with her, she’d been smiling more, and when making love she finally felt like his mind was actually on her and not something else. It had been a few weeks since this relationship turnaround, so naturally she felt like showing her sincerity with this affectionate gesture.
Coming up the apartment stairs, she could hear music and laughter resonating through the building. As she neared their front door, she realised that the noise was coming from their apartment. She wondered why as she began to panic slightly.
Had someone broken in? she pondered. It was when she heard the laughter of a woman that her heart began to sink. Her mind was racing as she searched frantically for the keys. All she kept sensing was that he was being unfaithful again. Or perhaps it was nothing more than an innocent social get-together? Confused, she fumbled with the keys. Just as she proceeded to open the door, she paused- did she really want to walk in on the party? After all, her boyfriend wasn’t expecting her until much later; maybe everyone would be gone by then. Standing in the hallway reasoning with the feeling of intrusion, it was clear to see the nervous pathetic creature she had become at the hands of his cruelty.
After a few minutes, she took a deep breath and opened the door. The small apartment was full of strange and familiar faces. They were playing the music from her private collection; nobody looked twice at her as she stood by the door. Uneasily, her eyes scanned the horizon searching for her other half, but from where she was standing she couldn’t see him. She entered the apartment properly and began looking for him in the living room. She heard that female laugh again. Her heart began thumping. She followed the obnoxious laughter and found herself at the bedroom door. She barged in on the most intimate of liasions: her boyfriend and some woman caressing each other, exchanging kisses and deep eye contact. Her world crumbled.
He glared at her, making her feel out of place. She released a few warm tears as she looked into the eyes of the other woman.
Her boyfriend rose to his feet and approached the blubbering mess he detested so much.
“This is Helena,” He boasted. Helena throw a contemptuous smirk at her, sitting comfortably on the bed.
The room was now slanting at an angle as dizziness overthrew her. The murmuring of the party guests formed a low buzzing as she headed to the bathroom, pushing people out of her way. He followed her and stood in the doorway, his disapproving stare intensifying.
“I want you to leave,” he sneered.
They argued as Helena watched, her arrogance emanating from the bed. The party guests had become spectators; some chuckled, while others frowned. As he dismantled the last pieces of her dignity in front of the apartment full of his friends, something inside her snapped like never before. She grabbed a beer bottle from the kitchen counter and launched it at his shoulder before thumping fiercly at his heavy chest with her feeble fists. He slapped her, then threw her out of the apartment, promptly locking the door behind her.
Humiliated and clutching her shoulder bag, she ran to the beach where she spent the next few hours cringing over the night’s events. As she sat at the edge of the sea, she opened the bottle of wine she had bought for them to drink together; and drank it alone. That night the tears she cried were indelible; the pain in her heart was wrenching and deep; the shame in her body weighed down her soul.
As she looks back at the horizon behind her, she can still hear that nauseating laughter as he threw her to her knees and shut the door in her face. She can still see that haunting look Helena gave her when their eyes first met. She can still smell the naivity with which she has loved him since the beginning.
Her sorrow seems to draw the waves near to her feet.
Looking across the ocean, her eyes continue to flood as she recalls the day they found her body. It was unclear whether she’d drowned intentionally, or whether it had been an accident.
She opens her eyes again as she reacquaints herself with reality. Her soul has found serenity since taking her own life, but every anniversary the unanswered questions lead her back to this place. As the night gets darker, she makes her way home; back to her secret place; the place where he will never hurt her again.
Copyright © Rachelle Renaix 2009
Published on writebuzz®:
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