Source:
Adults
Author:
Isabella Thornston
Title:
A Trip to the Doctors Office
Made it to the lobby early, new patient and all had all the papers to fill out. Three entertainers entered the waiting room and proceeded to do just that, entertain. One of the three sat in a wheelchair in her dried up eighty year old skin with her hair piled upon her head in glorious fashioned little poofy locks tied with bright hot pink ribbons. The lips on her sagging face were painted with the same hot pink color by the steady hand of a 3 year old. Her other two companions were not as colorful as she. A man, old ridgid and crounchety, husband I believe. And a caretaker, a woman all of about 45 who looked tired and frayed. So time begins to pass in the waiting room and a conversation between the three of them becomes all but private. Poodle wants to know where she is, and caretaker tells her she's at the doc's office to which whe replies no that isn't right I shouldn't be here I missed my time. Caretaker says no Louise, you haven't this is the right place. Poodle says no this is not the right one take me home. Caretaker says "I'm not argueing with you over this today, we are at the right place" A few minutes pass by and Poodle says, what doctor are we at? Caretaker replies, the one who saved your life, remember when you had a perferation? the one who saved your life? Yes the one who saved my life, says Poodle, but what it his name? Husband, who has been quiet up until now stands straight up and yells " God Damit woman your driving me crazy ". Then he proceeds to the nurses station to inquire. Yes, You see my wfe she has demintia, yes, and she thinks we are not at Doctor Tomei's office will you please just tell her for me that we are in fact at Dr. Tomei's office? No Sir. Well why not? Because you are not at Doctor Tomei's office you are at Dr. Lasquetti's office.
I thought I would fall out of my chair trying to keep from laughing my ass off.
Nurse takes the three of them to a room. The waiting room quieter now grows rapidly boring. Enter next group of entertainers: Beer Belly Dad with his family of four and Fake Boob lady with three animal print handbags. Ok. Maybe these people are just mormal.
Minutes pass. Beer Belly opens his mouth and immediately i know that no in fact they are not normal. He begins a conversation with Boobs across the waiting room about a cable tv show he saw last night that apparently had an impact on his life. No he didn't know the name of the show, or the network it was on, or even the host. But anyone would know him he said, he was a wrestler and then he got with the government and leaarned too much so he had to get out see. So he wrote a book about what the gorvernment is doing to us. You know a conspriratory theory? Oh Yeah, says boobs, I know exactly what you are talking about, his name is Kevin Trudo(Which of course it isn't but I just could not get involved at this point.) OH Yes, that's why I won't take any shots, or medicines because I don't trust the government. You know they don't know the effects on half the stuff that is being prescribed to the public. To this Beer Belly says well this treoryhas got me thinking, you know FEMA has coffens stacked up waiting for us to die? and even trains with guilloteens in them. You see, he tells her there are 120 poeple running the government and they control the population of the earth. If we get to populated they will create a disaster of kill some of us off.
Mame, Yes Me? Yes your next. Oh thank God.
After the appointment, I paid my copay of $20 and left. Once in the car I laughed all the way home. $20 for that entertainment was definately a bargain. Health Care? Um, not sure that's what it was. But whatever it was was damned funny!
Published on writebuzz®:
Adults
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