(For a history of Chere Julie, dear Jules click SEARCH, write Barry Gee in the author name and go to September 2006.)

Brineham

24th June.

Dear Jules.

I didnt write to you yesterday because what with the stabbing and everything it was a really strange day and the police came

round like they said they would and we all had to give statements and my dad said that he heard someone scream out No

No No about the time the stabbing happened but thats the first I heard about it. He didnt say anything before about that and

he told us earlier that he was sleeping when the police knocked on the door to ask us if we knew anything about it. I told

them the same that I done before that it seemed like a normal evening to me so then they starts on my dad and asks him to

copy the sounds of what he heard so they can get an idea of what the person who got stabbed was feeling. They wanted to

know if it sounded like the person who got stabbed knew the person who was stabbing him but I dont know what difference

that would make if you were being stabbed by a friend or a stranger. I think I would scream just as loud whoever was

stabbing me. But the policemen seemed to know what they were talking about and after my dad said No No No a few times

they decided that the man who got stabbed knew the person who stabbed him. I suppose they gets a lot of training in that

sort of thing.

I went and looked at a house thats to rent over in the posh part of town where most people owns two cars and sends their

children to private school and the women looks like they just come back from the hairdresser and bought new clothes on

the way home. I dont know if I would fit in there because although I done a lot of stuff and learned how to eat proper and I got

money I’m not sure I’m the type of person they wants living next door to them. It’s a furnished house and its really nice

furniture so I wont have to think about that but I’m not sure I could feel relaxed living with somebody elses furniture that I got

to look after and make sure that Francois dont make a mess on it. In the living room theres a white leather sofa but it

wouldnt stay white for very long with Francois around and I think I’d have to cover it with a cloth or something and that goes

for the rest of the furniture as well. Maybe I should find a place where the furnitures old or a place with no furniture at all and

I can buy my own. I dont need much just a bed for me and one for Francois and a couple chairs. Its all too much to think

about right now.

Francois slept a bit better last night and only woke up about once an hour and he fell asleep again almost immediate so I

been able to get some sleep myself but I still feels tired. I wakes up tired and all day I looks forward to going back to bed. I

told Kirsty about it and she said she could look after Francois for a couple days so as I could get a good nights sleep but I

dont know about that because he dont know her and me and him havent been apart since he was born and I dont know how

he would take to it but I am really tempted to let her do it. I am so tired I think I could fall asleep standing up right now. Kirstys

coming over later and I’ll talk to her about it and I’ll make out a list of the foods he likes and the games he likes to play and

his habits and stuff. Other mothers trust their children to child-minders and baby-sitters but I never done that because I didnt

need to because I didnt have a job and you was always there to look after Francois when I needed a bit of a break and your

family was a great help too but here I only got my mum and shes not as young as she once was and Francois is a bit of a

handful. I think I will ask Kirsty to look after him just for one night and then I will see how it goes. She really wants to do it.

I also bought Francois a pushchair because although hes a bit too old for one he never had one before because we had the

lawn outside the door and it wasnt needed but when hes seen other kids in pushchairs he said he wanted one so I bought

it. He dont want to sit in it but he loves pushing it what is a bit of a problem because it means we got to take it everywhere

because he dont want to go out without it. Hes really slow at pushing it what means that it takes us a really long time to get

anywhere.

Our letters seem to be passing each other by and we dont seem to be answering each other and thats a bit confusing so I

wants to suggest that we writes to each other just once a week like it used to be when I got a letter from you and wrote back

and then you wrote back when you got it and that kind of thing. I feels like writing to you all the time but I dont think its a good

idea when I am trying to make a new life for myself here. I hope you understands but I thinks its for the best. My mum is

looking after Francois right now and I can hear that he’s getting a bit restless so I think I will take him to the park in a while.

When I picked him up from the play-group today he was covered in felt-pen drawings over his legs and chest and back as

well and when I asked the woman how it had happened she said that he’d done most of them himself and the other

children had done his back. She said he was very popular and everyone wanted to play with him. What made me

suspicious was that it looked like a grown-up had done a lot of the drawings and it wasnt something that Francois could do

because hes only three years old and he dont know how to do a skull and cross-bones. The other mothers have really

accepted me now that I know whats going on in Coronation Street. I also bought a packet of cigarettes and handed them

around but I didnt take one myself and said that it was too early in the day for me and one woman said it was never too early

for her and she smokes two or three before she gets up in the morning and gets up several times in the night for a fag.

Shes got a terrible cough and it sound s really painful but she says that smoking is one of the few pleasures shes got in life

but it dont sound much like pleasure to me.

I met Heather in the park and shes not very happy because they are threatening to take her kids away from her unless she

sorts herself out and starts paying her bills regular but she says she’s doing her best and she cant help it if she got four

kids and they should have taught her more about contraception when she was in school and then it would never have

happened. I dont know about that because I went to the same school as her and we used to get contraception lessons

every week and sometimes every day with demonstrations using cucumbers what used to scare the life out of me and they

used to give us lots of warnings about diseases and stuff but maybe she wasnt there when they did that and I remember

that she didnt turn up very often and sometimes for weeks on end. Then she started crying really much and I felt a bit

embarrassed so I gave her twenty quid and that seemed to cheer her up. Francois and Paradise didnt pay any attention to

what was going on with Heather crying and stuff and they played in the sand-pit after I’d looked through it to see if there was

any broken glass or needles. There was hardly any glass and only two needles. Francois is starting to speak a bit of

English and knows how to say things like F... off what I dont want him saying but Paradise says it all the time so its hard to

stop him but I hope it dont become a habit.

I’m starting to find out whats happening in Coronation Street and theres lots of changes but its pretty much the same as

when I left but I’m not as interested in it as I used to be and only watches it so that I got something to talk about with the

mothers at the play group. I must remember to buy some more cigarettes. This morning I found out what types they likes to

smoke.

Sharon told me that Keiths bought a house and if I wants to rent it I can and he wont charge me much. She says its full of

furniture and the kitchens fully equipped and theres even clothes in the cupboards and the drawers are full of papers and

letters and stuff what I’ll have to get rid of. Sharon says I can live there for a few months if I wants to because Keith wont be

selling it yet because he has to sort some things out. I told her I would think about it.

I can hear Francois throwing a tantrum in the other room so I better go now. I hopes I get a letter from you tomorrow.

My best wishes to you and your family.

Julie.