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Stories & Scripts

Source: Adults

Author: joan crawford

Title: To Our Disappointed Fan

After last Saturday’s disastrous division 2 away defeat at which we lost 5-3, the management and team wish to offer you, our loyal supporter, our profound apologies for letting you down so badly and promise totry harder at one of the remaining matches before the end of the season. We sincerely hope that you will be able to attend that match

To be fair, some of us did play quite well during the first half & it seemed clear that we were going to come home with 3 points, however, our excitement at half time was such that we were all given Vallium in order to calm us down. We are now convinced that this medication was responsible for us all lapsing into a collective coma towards the end of the game. We don`t even remember the opposition’s last 4 goals being scored and we slept all the way home on the coach.

As a token of our respect and appreciation for your long term support we, the team, intend to have a collection after our six Saturday’s & Sunday’s intensive and exhausting training sessions. We hope that the total sum will go towards recompensing you for last Saturday’s train fare, gate money and a meat pie.

For those of us who are still in the team at the end of the season, it is hoped that friendly matches can be arranged against Man U, Liverpool, Chelsea & Arsenal; should we suffer defeat in any of these games we hope that you will not be too disheartened and that you will continue to support us next season. Many season tickets will be available in both the `gold` and `silver` stands and we are so grateful to all those kind people who have freed up their season tickets here so that others will have the opportunity to watch matches from a more comfortable environment; free refreshments will also be offered at half time.



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